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Among punk rocks many spin-offs and subdivisions (horror punk, funky punk and Christ-knows-what-else punk, etc.) perhaps no movement is as simultaneously obscure and awesome as Medieval Punk. Of course, when there is only ONE band in this beyond-exclusive genre, it not hard to figure out why it was obscure, but I’m here to tell you why it was also awesome. While anyone who has ever seen the 1978 Sex Pistols film The Great Rock ‘n’ Roll Swindle knows exactly who Eddie Tenpole is, the story of this band goes way beyond that of a crazy guy screaming “Who Killed Bambi” into a vacuum cleaner. Formed in 1974 while bands like The Sweet and Slade still ruled the UK charts, a young Edward Tudorpole (you can’t make something like that up folks) put together the wildly entertaining Tenpole Tudor, a bit pub, a bit pop, and although their wasn’t a word for it yet, a bit punk. Known for performing in period garb, with Eddie himself in a full chain mail suit, their unique brand of Middle Age madness is perhaps even more apparent in the video for "Wunderbar" but I couldn’t find a clean copy of it, so here is "Swords of a Thousand Men," released on Stiff Records in 1981. The old saying “they don’t make ‘em like this anymore” barely applies here, because in the case of Tenpole Tudor, they never made ‘em like this before or since!

Labels: Video

Labels: Video

Labels: Video

God only knows why Beatles engineer Norman Smith, who also produced such top notch UK acts as The Pretty Things and Pink Floyd, decided to step out from behind the mixing board one fateful day in 1972 and re-invent himself as "pop star" Hurricane Smith. Why Lord?

This is the guy that turned the knobs on total classics like S.F. Sorrow and The Piper at Gates of Dawn fer Christsake! What I'm saying is, HE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER! This horrible song absolutely haunted me throughout my childhood... I mean, it was everywhere, and looking back, I bet that no one was more surprised that it became a huge international hit than old Norman himself. Interestingly enough, the best and worst things I will ever post were recorded within a year of each other. It just goes to show what a totally haphazard and arbitrary time the early 70’s actually were. No wonder the muscle car died out and Detroit was never the same… can you blame it?

It pains me to post this, but if we've learned anything from Newton, it's that "for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction" so if I posted that genius and long lost Sparks footage, I simply have to post this... sorry, but I can't break the third law of motion, not even for this blog!

Look, I’ll be the first one to admit that I am prone to exaggeration. For some, it is a part of my “charm” and for others it’s a minor annoyance they put up. But I assure you that I’m not exaggerating in the slightest when I say that this is the greatest thing I will ever post. Why? Let’s start with the fact that I first saw this clip THIRTY FOUR YEARS AGO on the long forgotten late night ABC TV show In Concert, and it’s not a stretch to say that it totally changed my life. I only saw it once, but it set off a life long… shall we say “obsession” with the band Sparks that continues to this day.

Before seeing this, I never knew that rock and roll could be so clever, both ingenious and totally ass-kicking at the same time. Even among the slew of so-called “glam rock” bands that Ron, Russell and the boys were inevitably lumped in with, they were entirely unique, and I don’t think that’s ever been better illustrated than in this footage. Clearly they had fans in high places, besides the mob of screaming teens, you see none other than Keith Moon and Ringo Starr teaming up to introduce them. In all seriousness, I remember this clip like I saw it only yesterday; no other musical performance ever made such an impact on me. Do yourself a favor and stick with it until the end, because after they do “Something for the Girl with Everything” they break into a killer version of “Talent is an Asset” that still has me jumping around like I did when I was nine years old. Enjoy.

Labels: Video

Did you ever wonder what goes on at an NBA playoff game during a TV time out? Well, since your boy MLV was there and my trusty Casio Exilim digital camera can make short Quicktime movies, I thought I'd share... cover your ears!

My first ever NBA playoff game was everything I ever imagined it could be... and more! The amazing intro! Toni Kukoc in the house! The roar of the crowd when homeboy Derrick Rose hit the court! TRIPLE overtime! Ray Allen puts up 51 points in a loss! All that and... Joakim Noah! Lord knows I love the Golden State Warriors like I love my own mother (flaws and all) but... THE BULLS! This is what the NBA is all about baby!

Been chillin' with Alexei in Chicago for a few days now... Drink, talk, eat, drink, repeat! We got tickets for Game 6 of the Bulls vs. Celtics tomorrow, I'll definitely let you know how that goes...

Oh yeah, about this picture: Did you really think that I could walk by the Biograph Theater where John Dillinger was gunned down in 1934 and NOT do this?

The annual Gearhead inner-office NBA playoffs pool... in the immortal words of my nemesis Jeremy Stoner, "It's on, sucka."

Yes, Gearhead Magazine #18 is actually here, actually for sale on the website, and is shipping right now. So friends, I gotta check out for awhile so I can ship the thousands upon thousands upon thousands of copies (this was just one days shipment, about 1600 pieces) to fine folks like yourself all over the globe. So subscribers, you’ll get yours soon… advertisers, that goes for you too. And stores, if you haven’t ordered yours yet, please feel free to do so… seriously please do! I’ll be back ASAP, but right now, I have a several weeks long date with a box cutter and a tape gun… see you soon. Did I mention that it’s THOUSANDS of copies?

Arguably the coolest thing that ever came out of the lonely town of Perth, Western Australia, this totally genius band lead by Kim Salmon formed there in 1978 before taking off for Sydney in 1981, where they stayed until they relocated to London in 1984. They finally called it quits in 1987 after nearly a decade of kicking out some of the finest jams since… well since The MC5 first showed the world what kicking out the jams was all about. Just freakin’ killer stuff.

In the 80’s, my friend Frank Pappagallo (he of Where’s The Pope? Fame) from Adelaide, regularly sent me the latest Scientists releases in trade for American stuff like D.R.I. and Pleased Youth. I'd say I definitely got the better of that deal, but the point is, I’ve been a fan of The Scientists for over 25 years now, and I’m sometimes shocked that people that should definitely know about them still don’t. Well, if seeing them here in 1980 on an Australian TV show called Countdown doing the classic track “Last Night” doesn’t hip you to these guys, I guess nothing will.

Labels: Video

"I have no idea when the new Gearhead with me and Roger Miret on the cover will be out!” Well you can finally relax Alex, it’s at the printers now…

Has anyone ever actually heard this? If it sounds half as cool as it looks, I'm thinkin' it's a winner.

Again we fall back to the glory days of UK punk for our next entry, The Ruts. Formed in Southall, West London in 1978, their career was tragically cut short when singer Malcolm Owen died of an overdose in 1980, although they did go without him foe awhile as Ruts D.C. They did manage to release one brilliant LP called The Crack, which is easily as pivotal and important as Never Mind the Bollocks, Here’s The Sex Pistols, although you probably won’t be hearing Anthrax or Megadeth covering their songs anytime soon. No matter, The Ruts were hugely influential on the whole DC punk scene in the 80’s, in fact it was a young, still in Government Issue Jay Robbins that turned me on to them in the mid-80’s, sometime before Dag Nasty famously covered “Staring at the Rude Boys.” This video is for the track “Something That I Said” which is just about as perfect a song as has ever been written in any genre. It has everything, the melody, the big hook… and that’s why it still sounds great today.

Labels: Video

...in 1969 or any ol' year.

And what a fine game it was! My infamous cousin Beato got into town just in time to get over to Roaracle to see The Warriors easily knock off the Philadelphia 76’ers, despite the fact that they are right in the mix for the playoffs in the East while our bloodied but unbowed b-ball boys have been mathematically elimined from the post season. You’d never know it from this game though; they played ‘em so tough. Hopefully this event will be the first step in weaning Beato away from those other “N” leagues (NFL, NHL) but somehow I doubt it… unless of course they bring back the Pittsburgh Pipers!

Every so often, my beloved NBA team the Golden State Warriors have these "Road Game Viewer Parties" at various spots around the Bay Area during the regular season. I'd never checked one out before, but I always wanted to as they feature great prizes (tickets to games, autographed basketballs, etc.) and, perhaps more importantly, The Warrior Girls! So imagine my surprise when I heard that one was being held tonight at Tiki Tom's, a bar that is ONE BLOCK FROM MY HOUSE! No way I was going to miss it, and I gotta say that even though I couldn't get anyone to go with me, it was a blast. Yes sir, that's me with none other than Team Caption Alexis, who, along with the very charming Leah, hung out with me for longer than I could have ever imagined... I guess that despite my rapidly advancing age, I can still hold my own in the talking department anyway, which is good to know. Go Dubs!

Ah, the letter “Q.” I knew that this would be a tough one, but lucky for us, for the past 27 years The Queers have roamed the earth in one form or another. I was hoping to unearth some early footage from the legendary ‘82-84 line-up featuring original singer Wimpy, but alas, all my searching turned up nothing before the band reformed with guitarist Joe King (Get it? Jok-ing?) at the helm in 1990. So what the hell, here is the video for perhaps their best-known song “Punk Rock Girls.” I picked this because I was actually there at the Trocadero in S.F. in 1996 when this was filmed, and I have nothing but good memories from that whole era, so there you go.

Interesting 90’s punk rock footnote: This was not the only punk video shoot that I just happened to be at. I was also at Gilman when NOFX made the video for “Stickin’ In My Eye” but pretty much all I remember was how pissed off Fat Mike was at Eric Sandin for pushing that piano off the stage, because it was a rental! In hindsight, I wonder what Mike thought he was going to do with it? I mean, he couldn’t play it, obviously he was thinking about smashing it… but I digress. I used to hang around with those guys a lot back then, in fact I actually sing on the White Trash, Two Heebs and a Bean LP. Don’t believe me? Check the liner notes punky.

Labels: Video

Skis
A donkey
A grandfather clock
A boat of any kind
A trophy wife

Runner up: A player piano

Labels: Top 5